Bucket list

Oh Hey blog readers,

It's me again, and yes as usual my life's a mess.

SERIOUSLY WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE?!

Ever have that moment? Where all your other friends are engaged and you still can't make an omelette?

You realise that you are absolutely god damn ridiculous.

But you know what, I'm fine with that.

So instead of focusing on my future and whether I'm going to become a crazy dog or cat lady (it could easily be either lets be honest)

I'm going to focus on who I am and what I want to do.

Yeah yeah it's one of those "I think I need to take some time out from dating and really focus on my career" posts, but I'm not breaking up with you- we are still very much in love.

So instead of having new years resolution (plus I'm a teeny bit early for that) I'm going to have a bucket list of things I want to have done in year.

1. Do a god damn vlog. You see I made a vlog but then got all self conscious and didn't post it. It's easy for people to hate my blog but people of the internet as very nasty on vlogs. BUT I NEED TO GET OVER IT.

2. Knit a scarf. Knitting is supposed to be therapeautic and I really want a harry potter scarf- WIN WIN. I don't care what anyone says I'm a Gryfindor. You can suck it.

3. Fly a kite. Do you know I have never successfully flown a kite? What a sad childhood I had. If anyone wants to turn up at my house with a kite that would be great. Not in the middle of the night because that would be creepy rather than romantic.

4. Dye my hair a crazy colour. This is my last chance to get away with it. I mean I could just dye it, hate it and go back to a normal colour but atleast with bright hair wearing black all the time won't be so bad.

5. Go swimming in the sea. Even if it is freezing cold just have towels and hot chocolates waiting in the car. Just do it.

6. Play your electric guitar and become good. Like really good. Like OMFG WHO IS SHE good. It could happen.

7. Go to a club and dance so badly that no guy will come near you. Not even the creepy greasy guy in the corner. I want a circle gap around me, not from people cheering me on but from people being worried to come near me.

8. Become adequate at singing. Not good. For anyone who has heard me sing will know it will take a magical potion with unicorn blood to make me a good singer. Just so I can do Karaoke without deafening the room.

9. Smoke a cigar. I don't know why I just think they're cool. I can act sophisticated for 2 seconds before I start coughing my lungs out. THAT'S CLASS.

10. Meditate more and do yoga. Basically become more mindfull because your mind is as messy as my bedroom floor. Seriously I had to choose between having a bed or floor, I chose bed with a beautiful floordrobe.

11. Cook a proper meal without giving yourself food poisoning. It's a lot harder than it sounds I am awful at cooking.

12. Run a marathon. Ok so lets be realistic, a half marathon? Maybe just go for run. Just get about of bed and run to the kitchen. Build up to it.

13. Do a painting. I love to draw but a stack of sketchbooks noone ever sees is a waste. I want to do a painting I can hang on the wall.

14. Combat your fear and go ice skating and come back with all your fingers.

15, Get rid of a spider without killing it. Be brave.

16. Watch the starwars triology back to back and fall in love with it all over again.

So I'll probably add more to this, I just wanted to get it out of my head makes me feel better.

I've had to leave Colchester for a while because the harassment has been so bad but I just want you all to know I am safe and well.

It's just been a rough week.

Blog love

xxx